super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Michael Bay diarrhea
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
Randomize
