Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
Randomize
