return my video game
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
Randomize
