it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
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