ya dads aren't the best wingmen
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
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