physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
Randomize
