True but thats because hes a fetus.
Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
