I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
50% drunk capacity currently
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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