I hate your face
Who wears a wallet chain?!
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
Randomize
