I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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