So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
