But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
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