Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
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