dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
