i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize
