its not stalking. its research.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
Randomize
