its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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