Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Randomize
