im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
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