You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
