These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
