So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
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