that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
this hospital has no fireball
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize
