The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
don't take this the wrong way, but I'm not drunk but I need you to take me to the ER and you're the most likely to not be drunk now.
Randomize
