i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Randomize
