she asked me if the dress made her look fat, i told her no - the fat made her look fat.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
Randomize
