I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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