where am i from again
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
Randomize
