Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
Randomize
