I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
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