is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize
