Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
What happened to fro yo and sex?
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