Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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