Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
Randomize
