Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize
