We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
i black out too much to be "responsible"
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
Randomize
