used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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