I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
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