WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
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