Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
Randomize
