You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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