Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
