I think i sorta joined a cult last night
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Randomize
