normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
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