On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Randomize
