So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I hope mine doesn't look like that
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
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