New invention idea: vibrating tampons
Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
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