Nicole vs. Life
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Randomize
