4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize
