maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
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